Sam (jevim) wrote,

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(because I want to write something, and this is as good a topic as anything.)

D.A.R.E. came about after I was out of grade school. At least I think that is correct. Not that I wasn't a "good kid" already. But, I was not always a good kid, you see...

(Ladies and gentlemen, please put on your shock-proof helmets.)

So I would have been... 9 or 10 years old (3rd grade) when my family moved from the trailer park to our house. There weren't that many kids in the neighborhood, but there was a kid who lived across the street from me, who was as old as I was -- John.

I don't remember that much about this entire circumstance. I don't even really remember how old I was... but I know it was between the time when I moved, and maybe no more than 3 years later. I'm not really sure, but a few years after we moved into our house, John and his family moved to another house in town. I would've been in the end of my Cub Scout days, because John, me, and two other kids were our own little Cub Scout pack that drove 30 minutes to meetings (instead of going in-town) because the in-town Cub Scout pack didn't do that much. And we had meetings at John's house... so that would've been 6th grade, 3 years later.


I don't know how John came to have it, but he had a can of snuff that he hid out in the woods by our houses. John's dad used snuff tobacco, but I don't know if dad knew that his son had nabbed a tin of it for himself.

So I used snuff tobacco with John. I don't remember how long, or how frequently. I don't even remember what it really felt like, or if there was "a buzz" or anything. But one time (the last time I used snuff) I came home, and my mom saw (I assume) something in/on my teeth. I don't remember what happened. I assume that she was very upset with me, that I was sent to my room... but other than that, I don't really know. I don't remember.

But that incident... I haven't even told Dee about this until now. (Or, if I did, I don't remember telling her.) I've been ashamed of that for the longest time. I don't know what got me to try it, or anything.

I assume that this is why I've never really drank, at least not enough to get "buzzed" or "drunk" or anything. And why I never smoked. And probably why I came down so hard on my mom for smoking. I just remembered that little bit... and assumed what the rest of the reactions were.

And so, now you know yet another of my dirty little secrets. I hope you can deal with it.

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